MIASMA, INCORPORATED COMPANY CHARTER ADDENDUM
Elucidated by Chief Executive Overlord Yusis Orzand




CORPORATE DETENTION FACILITIES DISCLAIMER

Miasma, Incorporated detention facilities severely restrict network access, rendering beneficial enhancements to the perspicacity of the C.E.O. exorbitantly arduous to allocate.

Procuring the services of a Corporate Detention Facilities Warden would be superfluous, and highly deleterious to the cognitive integrity of the C.E.O.

ADDITIONAL CORE COMPETENCIES SPECIFIC TO C.E.O. YUSIS ORZAND

%Mandatory overtime business travel%

The C.E.O. may require in-network employees to engage in unusually laborious rapid transit, and perform operations under particularly hazardous environmental conditions. Network rapid transit infrastructure incurs magnified depreciation, and requires additional time for maintenance.

%Institutionalized regional network induction%

The concentrated effectiveness of this rapid regional network induction procedure can surpass an injunction from the Holy Brand LLC or affiliates, although proximity of the "next Savior" will still terminate the undertaking.

Miasma, Incorporated asset requirements are so substantial that a high ratio of debt to equity may result. The C.E.O. may not instigate insolvencies that render Miasma, Incorporated vulnerable to the forthcoming corporate raid of the "next Savior", once the Holy Brand LLC has partnered with a candidate for its decennial operations.

%Corporate meeting%

The C.E.O. may require in-network employees to assemble in pursuit of objectives. Inherent limitations in network rapid transit infrastructure necessarily constrain arrivals.

%Assume obligations of institutional investor%

This specialized and necessarily infrequent assumption of obligations renders the C.E.O. nearly impervious to litigation, while forgoing the prerogative to personally initiate a countersuit. The C.E.O. may still direct in-network employees to assist in various proceedings.

%Workplace personal appearance policy%

The C.E.O. has the prerogative to set or alter the expected standards of personal appearance at will, with regard to both in-network employees and out-of-network associates.

%Severance package%

While the C.E.O. may not personally downsize in-network employees, involuntary retirement proceedings conducted by out-of-network associates may be facilitated.

%Retail loss prevention plan%

Miasma, Incorporated assets possess an inherent proclivity, "love of that which torments life", that may be appeased in exchange for a strictly limited exemption from the constraints of the company charter. Resources antithetical to Miasma, Incorporated assets are additionally required.

%Corporate celebration%

With the cooperation of an amenable out-of-network associate, the C.E.O. may infrequently initiate a Miasma, Incorporated commemorative event.

___________________________________________________________________________


(Wait, what? _Now_ what did I just write!?)

(I'm trying to draw up a non-disclosure agreement, and you made another twisted business memo instead? Is this some kind of passive-aggressive protest? I'm not letting you out of lockup early.)

(Fine. Tell me what you want. If it's not murder, I'll consider it.)

(...no.)

(I said I'd consider it. I did, and the answer is no. Just no. Not happening. No.)

(It's not a "placard of self-actualization"; it's the idiotic name-pin I had as an intern! I am not wearing it when I fight the next Savior!)

(We're done talking about this. The next time you have to "notify" me about something, you can send me a mental text message - _if_ it's important. Don't abuse this privilege, or I'll revoke it.)

(Now, I'm going to draw up a completely fair, readable, and sensible non-disclosure agreement. Or else I really will turn my self-hatred into a "Corporate Detention Facilities Warden". That's _not going to be necessary_, is it?)

(Uh-huh. Good.)

(Look. I know I need your help. You didn't just invent "loss prevention"; you're the part of me that's hateful enough to make it work. So you'll have your time to shine, but don't get any other ideas.)

(I _will_ keep you under absolute control, for as long as I exist.)




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